Dear Fumi | by fumi

dear fumi

Tell me everything 👀

If you have ever submitted a question or request to my DM, please use this form to submit it here anonymously! If I select your question for response, it will be published in the “Dear Fumi” segment of my podcast! Be sure to exclude any identifying details that you do not want publicized.

Answers to these questions will be featured in my newsletter. Sign up below to see your question potentially answered.

Do not press the submit button more than once. Once you submit your question, please refresh the page to make sure your question has been posted.

Your question is saved and will appear when it is answered.

Answers So Far..

Someone asked:

on July 13, 2023 10:29 am

You say you are giving answers with utmost love,but why the sense of perfect person in your speech?
Someone asked:

on July 5, 2023 11:21 pm

Dear Fumi, I’m worried that softness and femininity doesn’t come naturally to me. I see so many incredible women balance strength and grace so wonderfully, but somehow I struggle with this. I don’t know if it’s something internalized or something cultural, but I’ve been told that I always seem a little “intense.” Growing up we lacked men in the house and had to make up for a lot of absences in the household, so I’m used to being in overdrive. It doesn’t help that my career is high-stress and cutthroat, which also rewards this “intense” approach to life. At this point it seems to be spilling over into my love life too, and I’m worried that I’m scaring perfectly fine men away because of it. Before I thought I’d find a guy who wouldn’t mind this part of me, but after a while I need to accept that I’m the common denominator in my dating life and see what I can do about this. You seem incredibly graceful while very clearly being a powerhouse, and I was wondering if you had some guidance to offer for this. Sincerely, Burnt on Both Ends
- Fumi replied:
  
  on January 30, 2024 7:00 pm
  
  There is really no way I can answer this kind of question in a forum like this. I recommend signin up for my newsletter, or one of my offerings. The grace and elegance you see in me took a lot of concentrated effort and consistent work that could never be boiled down to a bullet point list of tips
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 6:02 pm

Hey fumi I’ve seen alot of your content from YouTube and Instagram and your just that women that I aspire to be like and I need advice. When I met my now bf we started off as a friends w/benefits situation and a year later he wanted to make it serious. I said yes because on my side I wasn’t seeing anyone and from he told me he wasn’t either so I didn’t see the issue. It’s been great I met his family and and he met mines about 3 weeks ago. The curiosity got the better of me and I found out he’s been liking his exs photos on insta. He doesn’t know that I know. The part that hurt me was that she posted a photo the day after I met his family and he hearted it and it really hurt me. I would have easily brushed it off it wasn’t for the fact that it’s after I met his family. I don’t know what to do. I’m lost. He’s been great and I knew since the beginning that he would keep in contact with his ex because he said they didn’t end on bad terms, we’re adults I understand but after seeing that I question it now. I guess he didn’t cheat as far as I know but this really hurt me. He’s my first real relationship and this new to me I’d love to have some advice as the older sister that i and many of your followers see you as ❤️
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 2:53 pm

Dear Fumi, I’m a 21 year old girl from miles away from where you are. I struggle everyday to understand who I am. When I think about my career or passion I can’t really think of anything else other than wanting kids and being a mother some day. Sometimes I feel inadequate as an individual because I don’t have anything else that I truly feel passionate about. Is it wrong of me that I simply just want to be a mother when I grow up? I don’t seem to have many other aspirations other than family. I feel insecure at times that I’m not living up to the independent woman role. And I also struggle with just doing things for myself. The joy I find in doing something for others in my life I don’t feel the same joy when I just do it for myself. Do you think all of this is correlated and maybe comes from a place of low self esteem? I don’t know. I hope I figure it out as I grow old. Thank you for all that you do.
- Fumi replied:
  
  on January 30, 2024 7:01 pm
  
  There is nothing wrong with choosing the less traveled path, and there is so much beauty in motherhood. Low self esteem may be part of it, as well as a lack of conviction
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 2:17 pm

How do you handle forgiveness and accepting that your significant other isn’t perfect?
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 12:35 pm

What are your thoughts on dating apps, and do you think it’s possible to find true love through them?
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 9:50 am

Hello, how are you? What advice would you give to a 23 year old who is currently working on their healing? I can’t afford therapy, what channels, books or blogs would you recommend.
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 7:58 am

what qualities should you look for in a friend and what qualities to look out for
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 4:11 am

I am raising a young boy and it is scary how quickly misogyny’s reached him through his other socialising agents. What are some values your brothers were raised with both regarding and regardless of dating?
Someone asked:

on June 26, 2023 4:04 am

What do you think about dating in your 30s? Is the dating pool too thinned out, so should I lower my expectations/standards? Do you know real life cases of people finding the one in their 30s?