This is a lose-lose mentality that is not at all helpful, and will likely keep you on a cycle of unfulfilling relationships. If you are deciding to break celibacy with someone, you ideally should have taken time to decide what standards need to be met in order to do so before you start dating. This is why intentional singleness is so important. If you did not do that, then the next best thing is to take time to think about that now: ask yourself, “what would it take for me to make the decision to break celibacy, with no regrets?” And when thinking about this, consider the worst case scenarios–everything ranging from getting ghosted, to even worse. Because if you make the decision to be intimate with this guy, no matter when you do it, you need to own that choice–the narrative cannot be that he used or deceived you if things do not pan out. So while you are deciding the standards that must be met, make sure that you completely factor out fear of losing him, what he thinks, or how he will feel about having to wait to be intimate. Make sure the decision is 100% based on you.

I think you should prioritize the one person who has no say or choice in the matter, and that is your baby. That baby deserves two parents who love and will be there for him or her. I promise you that if you choose to have a baby with a man who does not even want to commit to a relationship with you, you are setting yourself up for at least 18 years of heartache and frustration and introducing that baby to suboptimal conditions that were in your power to prevent.